Sunday, January 27, 2008

Penis Tricks

Before I get to the main topic of this post you need to know that the name of my penis is 'Brown Crown One'.

I know many of my readers are fully aware of an act I commonly perform that has been dubbed 'The Ol' Penis Trick', but I feel I must explain it to those who are unfamiliar with this ability of mine. To put it simply, if I am presented with a test or exam I can flop out Brown Crown One on to the paper and let it rest for about 40 seconds, turn the test in and get at least a 97 on it. It works best when used with a biology or religion exam, because we all know how those two subjects love to dabble in people's sex lives.

Until recently, that was the only unique trick Brown Crown One could perform. Thankfully I have discovered a new penis trick, which has aptly been named 'The New Penis Trick'. The New Penis Trick was discovered out of necessity. A few days ago several of my chums were at our house wanting to play a video game. Sadly, no matter what anyone tried whenever the game was inserted sensually into the gaming console it would not work. Now, I don't like to be a hero, but I felt like god put me in that situation to save the day. I bravely stood up and walked over, snatched the disc from a friend and went to work. God, or maybe Tim, said to try touching Brown Crown One then touching the disc. I immediately thought that this was the most brilliant plan ever devised.

I touched Brown Crown One, through my jeans, not even skin-to-skin contact.

I touched the disc.

Restarted the system.

The game worked perfectly.

Brown Crown One can fix broken electronics.

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