While driving to the local food shop I noticed something odd. Just outside of town there is a Nie Funeral Home, and right by it there is a rather sharp dangerous turn. Either this is a coincidence or Nie is a genius killing house.
If I were them I would go to High School Musical fan clubs and pay the people there to drive at excessive speeds around that particular bend in the road. Because they obviously hate themselves and life (even if they don't realize it), and it would be a favour (look I'm British! or a dick hipster) to the rest of us non-subnormals.
Friday, February 20, 2009
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Kurt Cobain: Why he did it
After I got done brushing my teeth this morning, 2 pm because that is when I wake, I was taking a drink of water from the cup in my bathroom. This cup is about the size of a highball glass, just to give you an idea. But at the concave bottom of the cup my two eyes were reflected just right to form one eye on my forehead area, which I naturally assumed to be my jjanacaksu meaning I've finally reached enlightenment and Nirvana after years of patience and steadfast belief in the teachings of Buddha.
Looking into the normal mirror I was shown that my thoughts were not correct, and thus I've decided to become a dick to everyone and never trust bathroom glasses again.
Looking into the normal mirror I was shown that my thoughts were not correct, and thus I've decided to become a dick to everyone and never trust bathroom glasses again.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Taking care of business
I hate the way eggs crack into themselves. That is so fucking selfish.
I almost think they should talk to Kyle Thompson (hint for those confused, it is not the golfer).
The biggest dig in the world.
I almost think they should talk to Kyle Thompson (hint for those confused, it is not the golfer).
The biggest dig in the world.
Kissing your knee won't make you not throw up
With the year 2012 coming up there are many thoughts about the apocalypse. Many from the Maya calendar. But I'm going to prop up a new position of thought. I think the world will end in 2012, around August. Mainly because of Rudolf Diesel.
He is, obviously the inventor of the diesel engine and thus gave life to modern day freaks, dead.
After his great creation he was lost 'overboard' the ship "Dresden", no one knows how he fell over or anything at all relating to his death.
I believe it was the machines giving birth to themselves through the destruction of their own creator, (a whole classical literature thing that I pop blood vessels upon) to rev up a revolution of diesel machines. Diesel machines having failed I now fear Chloe Sevigny, trying too hard to be it.
He is, obviously the inventor of the diesel engine and thus gave life to modern day freaks, dead.
After his great creation he was lost 'overboard' the ship "Dresden", no one knows how he fell over or anything at all relating to his death.
I believe it was the machines giving birth to themselves through the destruction of their own creator, (a whole classical literature thing that I pop blood vessels upon) to rev up a revolution of diesel machines. Diesel machines having failed I now fear Chloe Sevigny, trying too hard to be it.
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Time to kill today
Tonight I have drunk a fifth of Jack and about 4 beers. But I started drinking at like 5, so it has been some time. But spelling myself out only makes it seem like I know how to manipulate the english language.
Sun Tzu in the end
As a rebirth blog, I am asking my 3 faithful fans to challenge me.
Give me an amount of alcohol and a time limit to consume it I shall blog it and see what happens.
You might also say like drink "x" and watch "x" and see how it comes out.
Whatever, just challenge me. And god penis you all.
Give me an amount of alcohol and a time limit to consume it I shall blog it and see what happens.
You might also say like drink "x" and watch "x" and see how it comes out.
Whatever, just challenge me. And god penis you all.
Kill Anderson
Back in '86 I went to Branson and got hocked up with a post office job by a guy named Collard. I met him a a bar and he brought me in, but got fired two weeks later for being a drunk.
So I was new in town and green at the job. Most the guys who had their shit together just stared down the manager. I tried the same but I was a vagina on legs so it didn't work too well. I had to learn how to be a man and work my shift.
The quickest way to accomplish that was to come to work smoking a cigarette and put the cig out on another guy's face. Then if anyone else tries to jump in I pull my small waist knife and cut my palm. I do little damage to myself but show the bullshitters that I'm not Ray Liotta'ing shit everywhere, and the attacker escapes singing sad sad songs. Fool proof plane. As long as no one is serious.
So I was new in town and green at the job. Most the guys who had their shit together just stared down the manager. I tried the same but I was a vagina on legs so it didn't work too well. I had to learn how to be a man and work my shift.
The quickest way to accomplish that was to come to work smoking a cigarette and put the cig out on another guy's face. Then if anyone else tries to jump in I pull my small waist knife and cut my palm. I do little damage to myself but show the bullshitters that I'm not Ray Liotta'ing shit everywhere, and the attacker escapes singing sad sad songs. Fool proof plane. As long as no one is serious.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
