occupation

I am now pretty late into my earthbound life. I figure, at best, I have 4 years left. So I've decided to follow my one true dream. And that dream is to be an actor.

Not just any damn actor, but the actor in infomercials who represents the old school way. I want to be the guy who shows how normal knives or ab workouts just don't cut it these days. All it takes it for you to hold a knife, try to cut a tomato, and then fuck it up so much that any way besides the new doesn't work. That usually means slashing at the item and make a mess and possible cutting yourself and throwing the knife to the side. Also it is all shot in black and white (to show the past) and big red 'X's over my hands. Or for the abs, I try to do a normal crunch and just gyrate the fuck out of myself on the ground without getting more than an inch off the ground and then hold my back showing how much the old workouts destroy my body.

I think I can actually do all that. Just be a complete fucktard and not know how to do simple everyday things. The best would be if they had a new ass wiping machine. I would shit and then just jam my hand up my ass with a roll of paper towel and look at the camera confused. We'd sell a deuce and a million.

Spring forth from my rib.

About one or two thirds worth of the holy trinities days ago I had a conversation with my roommate when I epiphanized all over my stomach, chest and a dribble on my chin.

We were watching television when the treehouse South Park episode came on. A vision struck me. I saw myself years down the line talking to mustache-jr and he wanted a treehouse. Me, being a cock wielding human knew I could build it myself without any help from professionals. Then about 20 seconds later my vision showed my son being crushed to death by my work.

This actually isn't a vision, it is how my first 4 born died.

Well, kind of. The third also died of not having a mustache. He was kind of a dick.

Future

I've talked to a few "human beings' while I can't I double quote.


"Human Beings" there we go. So I've talked to a few of these double quoters and my love for violence raises. Hats tossed, boots cut, hair trimmed. Huzzah.

Panathostqbndlgb.

Fuck this.